Out of Order

Time is not real

It’s just our floppy brains trying to make sense of the world

We want to think that our lives are linear

But Autism has proven that my life is out of order.


Atoms don’t care which way time flow

They act the same no matter the direction

I, unfortunately, am not the same

And it’s clear you see, that my soul is moving backwards


As a child, I was interested in talking to adults

I found my peers unpredictable and boring

As an adult, I still think my peers are boring and unpredictable

I haven’t grown much


As a child, I liked adult stuff

Like nonfiction books about Ancient Rome and WWII

As an adult, I like things made for kids

Who says I can’t love cartoons and board games?


I don’t know why Autism is fighting the flow of time

Or why the older I get the younger I seem

People say that age is just a number

I wonder if this is what they mean.